This Milk's For You, Kid!

Oh my gosh.

First of all, I want to say that I want to reply to each of your comments on here and on facebook, but it will take forever!  There's so much I want to say and so much you have said that has touched me deeply!  I can't express how much love there is in our little house at this time--not just for Camille and for Brian, but for everyone we know.  I'm actually tearing up saying this--it has been so overwhelming and we'll just never be able to communicate how wonderful you guys are.  Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Next up--Camille.  

I cry when I hold her for any extended period of time.  Sure, it's partly hormones.  But, there is just this instant and overwhelming love for her that only parents can know.  I always thought "okay--yeah, I imagine you love your baby a lot" when parents talked about it.  I even thought I got it when I was pregnant because we already loved her so much then.  No--there's just no way I could have understood what people were talking about.  When I saw her for the first time it was like we knew each other and that she'd been a part of my life forever already.  Thinking about being away from her for a day crushes me already.  I'm getting too weepy to continue on with this kind of talk.  I just never thought I'd love anyone so much.  She's stolen our hearts completely.

On that note--I apologize to anyone who had babies before me for not fully appreciating the magic that happens when you have kids.  All of the baby showers I went to and people I congratulated--I never really got how amazing it was for you, and I'm sorry I didn't get as excited for you as I should have!  Now I know!

Joyful Challenges:
We've been breastfeeding it up over here!  It has to be one of the hardest things ever (after labor?  before labor?  it's up there).  Just the fact that it has to take place around every three hours (from start to start) makes it super exhausting.  Next, you're the only person that can do it; no passing it on.  Then there's the fact that someone is munching on sensitive parts.  Luckily we haven't had too hard of a time with this compared to other stories I have heard.  We are surviving.

Sleeping--her and me and B.  I try to let B sleep through the night so he can help me rest during the day. So far, so good.  When neither of us rest because Camille isn't resting we call in the big guns: Grannies!  I've only had to do it once so far (we've only been home two days....), but man does it help!   Like I said, with breastfeeding I have to get up at least every two hours, so that has been rough.  I'd be sleeping right now, except that I think C has reflux.  She doesn't do well flat--she spits up a lot and cries a lot.  Right now I have her propped up on a boppy in her crib and she's sleeping beautifully.  No fussing, no stirring!  Of course, with all of the safety warnings against that, I'm a nervous wreck and have to stay up to make sure she's still breathing every few minutes.  :)  Any suggestions on sleeping at an incline are MORE than welcome!  I'd love to be cuddled up next to B on a cold night like this.

Hygiene.
Yeah...when did I brush my teeth last?  Deodorant?  What's that?

It's not that bad (although I really haven't put deodorant on in at least a full day now).  I did shower today and I got to shave my legs--WOW.  This was two different times in the tub, but still.  Awesome.  I even washed my hair.  No, I didn't dry it or fix it.


Eating
I ate an orange at midnight (last feeding)....but before that I last ate at 2pm.  Granted, it was a huge meal, but still.  There are no meal times--grab something when you can!  Every man for himself!  Plus you're supposed to increase intake...hah.  When?  Also, I weighed today--and I'm only down 10 pounds.  Camille weighed 8!  I'm chalking it up to milk flow and swelling/fluids.  I'm still puffy.  Still-not so encouraging.  I'm not really worried about it anymore honestly.  I just want Camille to be happy, and so far we are doing okay.

Pain
I have a pain in my right side...hurts a lot if I bend over too much.  Anyone know what that is?  Then there's residual pain from labor (know what I mean?).  It's not so bad though.  I don't know how much I tore, but it wasn't enough to cause lots of discomfort.  That's actually been the easiest part of all of this.  Rock on!

Reflection on labor:
I think if you'd have asked me if I would go natural again a day or two ago I'd have said no way.  However, now I'd say TOTALLY.  I feel so good right now as far as moving around and healing quickly.  Camille's so alert when she's awake, feeds so easily, and isn't a crier at all (unless she feels bad--reflux)--I don't know if that's because there were no drugs used, but it sure seems like it was part of it.  Can't hurt!  Plus, labor is so short in comparison--it was a couple of hours of some pain, some discomfort.  As long as you're prepared to move around (which is hard as bonk to do when you're in pain) and to just stay OFF of your back for labor, it's really not bad.  Plus, it makes the pushing part SO easy and so fast!  Her little head came out perfectly shaped because she was only in the canal for a few minutes (or less?  I have no idea).  Mom says I only pushed about 5 times and bam, she was out!  You just can't do that on your back or without being able to feel where the baby is.

Sweet moments:
Skin on skin action with Camille has to be the most heavenly thing on Earth.  Her little smell and her baby soft skin and hair are the most precious things to be around!  I just want to lay with her on me all day!  She's so sweet!
Today she got quiet in the middle of a big fit today because Brian was talking to her.  I mean, zip--she just stopped crying at the sound of his voice.  The recognition there and the love between them melts me.


Funny moments:
Um, yes, I walked around the house today topless.  Girl.  Sometimes these things just need to breathe.

Aunt Linds came over to hold Camille and while she was laid out on Linds's stomach she got some more gas.  Her little booty raised up each time, which made Linds giggle, which helped C with her gas.  It was a great little exchange.


Again--thank y'all so much for all of your love and support and encouragement!  I can't wait for everyone to meet her!  I promise I will post pictures soon--I know it seems like we're dragging there.  It's just hard to find time to load them all and to have all of the equipment together.  Plus, we are not doing a great job of taking a lot since our hands are pretty full.  B's been back at work already for the past two days, so it's hard to manage all of that.  We'll get it!  Promise!

...about time to feed C again...